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Sir Bear, aka Leto Armitage, Quartermaster
Have you ever wondered what would happen to a rose vine if it developed a hive mind consciousness and psychic powers?
Do you start to fade off to sleep and find yourself pulling out your phone to write a dirty scene in an elevator during a hurricane?
Being a writer is weird, but I would encourage everyone to do this, whether it becomes a story or not. Indulging your imagination is fun. These are the tides we as literary pirates ride.
What I’m doing here is priming the pump of course. I’m at port in a pub and getting you ready to hear my stories, warming you up, hoping to pique your curiosity. Unless you’re cute and female in which case I’m willing to pique more.*, **
So, today I have a mid-coital snack, some Spooktober content and a protagonist that blurs the line between erotica and horror on the menu. Read on.
* Captain’s note: The Quartermaster is a horrible flirt, ladies, but he’s a perfect gentleman. You can just ignore this.
** Quartermaster’s note: I contend I am a delightful flirt.
In This Week’s Ship’s Log
The Captain says I should tell you people what I’m working on and there is actually a good bit. A modern writer has to do a lot more than just write and the problem of non-writing tasks taking away from the writing is even worse when you have as many interests as I do.
Let’s settle in with our favourite brew and talk about mys. In the wild and woolly world of pirate lore and Scandi culture, mys is a haven. Picture a small, snug cabin on the ship where the warmth of flickering lanterns plays on timeworn wood and stacks of well-thumbed books. It’s where the salty sea air mingles…
Sometimes you lay around in between rounds, checking your phone, playing music, joking and having a good snog. And sometimes when you’re sitting up, checking Tumblr while rubbing a fine ass with the other hand, you realize you’re a tad peckish…
There are times when the mind is willing, but the flesh is weak, just as there are times when the opposite holds true. What we rarely talk about are those times when mind and flesh are in agreement, and fully prepared to go all in, even when they shouldn’t. Because, quite frankly, it’s a bloody bad idea.
Last week, I reclaimed the quill from Sir Bear and ordered him to get some rest. (Ever tried to wrestle a Bear? It ain’t easy, I tell ya, and you can safely expect it to come back and bite your arse when you least expect it.) Once he was properly wrestled, I took the opportunity to write about burnout, mental health and the importance of having mentors, menial tasks and loads of mys in your life.
Well, guess what?
This is me stepping in again. This time to say thank you very much for popping in to see us today. I’ve tucked my Bear in for the night, but he will be back with a few more posts and updates in this week’s Bottle Post. Check it out for more Leto-isms, bear bites and another chunk of spooky stuff to pave our way to the Halloween celebrations.
Until then – smooth sailing and sweet dreams, messmate!
//Sir Bear & pet 🏴☠️
Image Cred: Bear images and tarot cards made with MidJourney and the snack tray is from our private collection. All other images are licensed from Canva Pro.
ABOUT LETO ARMITAGE
Leto Armitage was born in America under a set of circumstances that prophesied that he would one day unite the lost tribes and return the Ever Summer. Somewhere around twelve, he realized he had been left unsupervised and binged too many Arthurian movies in his formative years and that he was just another kid who accidentally got an education while reading above his age level.
By the time he turned old enough to get a passport, he started finding excuses to travel determined to find out what culture, food and women there were to experience. After learning to grill in Oaxaca, do kinbaku in Japan, and being banned from several former Soviet block countries, he returned home to settle down and see what damage he could do locally.
After working jobs including being a short order cook, bodyguarding strippers and professionally doing reader’s advisory for erotica he realized the most reasonable path forward was to become a writer. Today he lives with cats, dogs, and humans who seem to like him despite actually knowing him. He prefers to sit on his back deck, listening to the birds and Barry the Bumblebear bee, while he writes cozy, uplit romance and raunchy erotica.
BOOKS BY LETO ARMITAGE
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